Your answer is yes — at least some of the time. When we polled Women.com users during the month of July, more than 2,600 people responded. More than 85 percent answered, “All the time” or “Sometimes,” while only 15 percent said, “Never.” Interestingly, when asked if they needed their partner’s affirmation to feel sexual, 45 percent of our visitors said, “Yes.” Since it’s not wise to solely depend on our partner’s compliments to feel good about ourselves (helpful though it may be), how else do you get in the mood when plagued by the body image blues? Women.com members offer these 10 tried-and-true ways:
1.
“If I’m ever feeling bad about an errant jiggle or some extra weight I might be carrying, I visualize the woman beneath — the sexual dynamo who peels herself out into the open whenever I request her presence. She’s wise enough to know that sexuality is unaffiliated with measurements.

2.
“I look into my partner’s eyes and don’t let our gaze break until I’m focused on him and us, rather than on myself. That makes the whole experience more intimate and powerful, and I don’t think about not liking my thighs!”
– Angie in Greensboro, N.C
3.
“The more I concentrate on relaxing and enjoying myself — simultaneously combined with 20 to 30 minutes of massage and foreplay — the more I feel in the mood. When I’m not relaxed, my thoughts are always preoccupied with how fat I am or how I’d be a better lover (i.e., less inhibited) if I had a thin, fit body.”
– Stephanie in Tucson, Ariz
4.
“All I do is stimulate my clitoris, and all negative body thoughts disappear, replaced with tingles of pleasure.”
– Michelle in Connecticut

5.
“If I’m in my fat mood, I usually do the things that drive my partner crazy. This gives me the confidence that he’s concentrating on the pleasure, not the figure.”
– Janice

6.
“I need foreplay — at least 20 minutes of it — to really feel good about being sexual with my spouse. A kind word about how I look doesn’t hurt either.”
– Julie in Suwanee, Ga.

7.
“I tell myself that my body is only one aspect of who I am, and I think of all the other qualities I have that make me worthy sexually, like the way I kiss, massage or talk to my boyfriend in bed. Sometimes, I think about a previous encounter with my partner in which I blew his mind, reminding me that I am a sexually charged woman, even if I don’t like my body all the time.”
– Nancy in Pennsylvania

8.
“To get in the mood, I’ll buy some lingerie and have dim lighting — light a candle or even make love by the flickering of the TV. And sometimes, I’ll stand in front of the mirror for about 30 minutes before my partner sees me, to make myself feel more comfortable about my body.”
– Kathy in New Jersey

9.
“Ever heard of the saying ‘Walk into the room like you own it’? It totally works. I’ve had guys tell me, ‘The first thing I noticed about you was the way you hold yourself, and the way you walked into the room.’ Well, it’s the same way in bed. If you act like you’re sexy, you will BE sexy. It’s as simple as that.”
– Kim in Omaha, Neb
10.
“Usually I end up fantasizing. Then it doesn’t matter what either of us looks like.”
– Heather in Amherst, Mass.