Four Ways To Manage Your First Openly Gay Date

Most gay people, today, realized early in their lives that they were gay and proceeded to deal with that knowledge in various ways. If they were lucky, their families were supportive of the fact and they never had to hide who they were. Others weren’t so lucky and had to move far away from home in order to live their lives or they had to experience the pain of hiding their true selves. No matter how you come out of the proverbial closet, there’s always that very first date that you have as publicly gay person. Whether there should be or not, there will be some differences from going out on a first date as a straight person.

First of all, people will probably notice you and will see that you and your date are gay. So what? While they may feel that what you’re doing is “abnormal,” you’ll feel completely right about the choices you’ve made, and that’s what’s important. However, you don’t have to go overboard to make it clear that you’re on a gay date just as straight people don’t need to overdo things on their dates. Treat your date with courtesy and respect and expect the same in return.

Most couples usually hold hands or put their arms around each other at some point during a date. If you and your date are comfortable enough with each other to do that, there’s no need to restrain yourselves. Now, something that you may want to keep in mind is to not conduct a full make out session in the middle of a restaurant or on a public park bench. That’s considered bad form even for straight couples. There’s no need to intentionally call attention to yourselves. Too many gay couples feel the need to “prove” something in the beginning of their publically gay lifestyle. Don’t feel that way. Simply enjoy your time with your date and behave like a respectful human being should.

Many gay couples find that it’s easier to visit prominently gay establishments when they go out. It’s simply more comfortable and they can be positive that no one is judging them. There are many clubs, restaurants and resorts that cater to primarily gay clientele and the majority of these are quite upscale. Your first openly gay date may go better if you choose to visit somewhere like this. That’s not to say that you can’t enjoy a movie in a more heterosexual environment. It just means that, if you’re nervous, you may want to start out somewhere that you KNOW you’ll be accepted and encouraged.

Something important that gay couples need to remember is that the world is becoming more enlightened every day. Older members of a predominantly judgmental society are also getting older with each passing day. As they die off, younger and less judgmental people are taking their places. Of course, there will always be that certain group of people that feel only THEIR way is right, but they’re going to always be around no matter how long the world turns on its axis.

So just go on your first publically gay date and love it, no matter what anyone is saying about you! If they’re talking about YOU, they’re giving someone ELSE a break.