Personalizing Wedding Vows From The Heart
You have probably put in a lot of effort into having a wedding reception that will sparkle with your own style. The question is, do you have to work as hard your wedding ceremony have to be different as well? You won’t have to if you write your wedding vows personally because this will give the ceremony itself something unique and heartfelt.
Deciding on your Style
You can each write your wedding vows (he makes his own and you make your own) or you can come up with one common piece that both of you will say together. You can also each say your personal vows then set aside a part that will be read by the two of you. You can take the traditional wedding vows and personalize them. There is a lot you can do to make this part of the ceremony less ordinary.
A Good Wedding Vow is a Pact
The substance of wedding vows is that two people, in view of their community, are making a pact and they are making public the promise they are giving each other. This pact must clearly show a declaration of love. It should also contain what the couples promise to make the union endure. Then, the vows should include personal touches from the bride and the groom. The style of the vows should be consistent even if they will be spoken by two individuals. On a more practical note, they should not be longer than three minutes.
Determining the Content
When you write, you can highlight the points that you want to stress. This could be faithfulness or appreciating each other’s individuality or supporting each other through common goals. You can build your vows to bring up significant details depending on what is important to the two of you. For example, you could bring up significant events that led you to believe that you want to grow old with this person. You are also allowed to be humorous about how you think you will do to hold up your end of the bargain.
Get Help from a Pro
A professional wedding planner or your officiant can help you write your vows by showing you examples and helping you find sources to guide you as you write. It is important that your vows are compatible with or conform to the requirements and values of your faith as individuals – especially if yours is going to be a mixed marriage.
Saying your Vows in Public
It is important to practice reciting your vows so that you can sound sure and relaxed when you say them in public. However, do speak naturally, not like someone making a speech. It is okay to read your vows – just assign someone beforehand who will give you your cue card and retrieve it when you are done. It is also okay to cry!
What to do When you Get Writer’s Block
When it seems like you can’t get a word on paper, do check out available literature. Try going through books like Weddings From the Heart, by Daphne Rose Kingma or browsing through websites like celebrantusa.com to get inspired or get some ideas to start you off. Maybe you’ll see something that goes like this: Richard, you give me hope and strength. I promise to be your friend and your lover always, to encourage you and support you for as long as I live. When you read words like that and you are on the threshold of the same experience, no doubt you will get a jumpstart to get the creative juices flowing.
