online dating

10 Quick Tips To Successful Online Dating

Are you new to the world of online dating? Here are 10 Quick Tips to help you succeed with online dating while protecting yourself against the predators and losers out there.

1. Create a screen name that is interesting but not too sexy. You want to avoid any hints of marriage or wanting to be married or have immediate sex like "WannaBeMarried82" or "SexKitten69". A screen name that includes your name should also be avoided because the second reason for an alias is to avoid putting yourself out there too soon. You want to give your real name to the right person and not just everybody. Try a screen name that is based on your looks which is usually appealing to men. Or, avoid it all together, and use something obscure.

2. Avoid sending emails to every man you find in your zip code, outside of the 50 mile radius of where you live or thousands of miles away. While quantity does generate a lot of response, you want to be selective and sane. This means that you will need to be patient. Some men will contact you, and that will most times lead to a date that is kept, and not a bunch of responses from tire-kickers who are never going to leave their houses. If someone you fancy does not contact you, send him a short e-mail and then wait for him to follow up. And, I do mean wait.

3. When you've made contact by email, avoid answering any questions you would not answer on a first date. If the man starts asking too many personal questions, beware. Don't tell your prospective date anything about your income, past relationships, medical problems, etc. It is also not a good idea to tell him about how much you want to get married.

4. Include more than one photograph when you decloak. And be honest. If you're not a 5'10", blond-haired, blue-eyed beauty, don't put out a picture like that. Men find the visual aspect much more attractive and remember there is always a lid for every pot. If you post many photos, a man will get a better idea about how you look and whether you are his type before he meets you. This is very important. There's nothing worst than going on a date with someone you dislike or who is less than thrilled with you. Better to put it all out there in as flattering a manner as you can. Then, the man is coming to see you and not some fantasy in his head.

5. If they don't send you their photograph, forget it. He has something to hide. On photos, if he sends you a picture of himself naked or doing something less than polite, forget it. He has too little to hide, and you will wind up in a mess from the door.

6. On most of the online dating services, you have the ability to send only a profile and a picture. This can be done almost automatically with a couple clicks of a button. Take it for what it's worth. If a person only sends you his picture or his profile, he didn't waste too much time or thought on you and he may not be worth a response. If he doesn't have the time to write you an e-mail, it is not worth wasting your time on him.

7. When you do get an email, always wait at least 24 hours (48 is better) before you respond to your prospective date's e-mail. If you respond too quickly, he may get the impression that you are too desperate or that you have too much free time. That is the worst thing you can do. You want to always be "squeezing him in" even if you weren't doing anything but mopping the kitchen floor and doing your nails. If he thinks he can go out with you any time, he'll treat you like you have nothing to do but wait on his phone call.

8. Don't log on to your personal website or answer e-mails on a Friday or Saturday. Watch Battlestar Galactica and Stargate Atlantis. You must give the impression that you are not available, even if you are. So find something else to do besides looking desperate.

9. If a man does not respond, stop e-mailing him. If he is really interested in meeting you, he will contact you and ask you out for a date. If his responses are slow, it means he's not that interested. You are his second choice and not worth bothering with. You want to always be his first choice. A quick response means interest in all things. Ask yourself, when you wanted to buy that new, hot DVD or CD, did you wait around for a couple weeks before making a commitment to purchase? Well, if a number of days pass and there's no email, you aren't the hot DVD.

10. If you exchange numerous emails and there's no commitment to even meet for coffee, you need to rethink where this relationship is going. If you're looking for an email relationship, that's great. This guy is perfect. However, if you want a live date, you need to up the pressure subtly and throw out a hint. Mention that you are going out with friends and consider stopping all communication with him. He'll either get off the fence or go away. Either way - some will, some won't, so what, next!

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Judith Brandy is a writer, science fiction fan and breast cancer survivor. Visit her site for other free articles on a myriad of topics. http://www.writingbuzz.com