Knowhow-Now Article

Reinvent Yourself after Divorce

By Andrew Wilson

Andrew Wilson

Divorce is one of the hardest transitions a person has to go through in his life. Financially, emotionally, and career-wise, the changes it creates in a short period can be overwhelming. Many things are put on hold; adjustments have to be made, sometimes drastically, which takes a toll not only on the couple, but more importantly on the children involved, family and friends who are caught in the middle during this tough time. The good news is this is also an opportunity to start on a clean slate, create a new life for you in the future. This is your chance to create a completely new you if you want to. 

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Here are some helpful tips for self-reinvention after divorce:

  • Be kind to yourself. Focus on your holistic well-being. Now that you have enough time for yourself, stay fit, eat healthy, and stay away all forms of vices. Have a regular exercise routine and take all the vitamins and food supplements that you need to boost your immune system. Avoid all processed foods. Go for organic fruits and vegetables whenever you can. Get sufficient rest and sleep. Consult your doctor about a cardio workout that facilitates endorphin release, which will help elevate your mood. These days you need to be in a positive state of mind all the time.
  • Create a support network for yourself. Fill your calendar with worthwhile activities with friends and family who will be there to boost your self-esteem and give you emotional support during these trying times. Self-reinvention after divorce means creating new relationships, new friendships and in general, a whole new outlook in life. This is also a great time to get counseling and process all your emotions to find out which negative patterns to get rid of and which new ones to adapt to your life positively. 
  • Explore your interests. Maybe your marriage made it difficult for you to explore new things and interests. Perhaps you wanted to travel and see those places you have always marveled about in those magazines. Maybe you want to take up a sport or a new hobby. Go ahead. Now is the time to do this. Go on a new adventure. If you think this is your chance for self-actualization, go. As long as this will not keep you away from your responsibilities with your children or career, there is nothing wrong in trying out these things.
  • Set up goals. Nothing can be more fulfilling than accomplishing your goals in life. You may not have succeeded in the past, but this is not supposed to stop you from looking forward in the future. Set up goals not only for yourself but for others as well. See how you can be of use to others in your community. Take part in a group or non-profit organization that is there for a worthwhile cause. Help gather funds for them. Share your time, effort, resources, and talents with them.
  • Mend loose ends with your ex. This may not be easy for those who went their separate ways in a bitter and violent manner. Nevertheless, in time you need to be able to forgive each other in order for the both of you to move on truly. You cannot do this if you do not have peace of mind. The only way to achieve this is to humble yourselves and make the first move. You have to accept the fact that you are only human and with that come mistakes. Bad things happen even to the best of marriages. Therefore, patch things up and eventually try to be friends, especially if there are children involved. Nothing is more painful for a child than knowing their parents hate each other.

Remember, every day is a new day. So follow these tips and you are well on your way to a great self-reinvention after divorce. 

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