Bad Relationship Habits to Work On
Every relationship falls into disarray at some point in time through the use of bad habits. The way to keep those from taking over the relationship, and possibly ruining it, is to get those bad habits in hand before they do irreparable damage. The following are some that may be present in your current relationship and how you can go about fixing them:
Stop saying "You always….." when having an argument about something. You need to speak using "I" statements when talking about your own feelings. Don't tell your partner how he or she feels about something or what they do. Start your sentences with "I feel…."
Don't take the words "I love you" lightly. This isn't a way to end phone calls or text messages. It's not a way of saying goodbye when one of you walks out the door. This is something you worked hard for. So you need to say these words up close and personal to your partner.
Start showering together once in a while. Couples stop paying attention to each other's bodies after a while. That's why showering together occasionally can be really hot. Washing your lover's body is quite an intimate act and can cause all sorts of heat.
Write down your thoughts on paper rather than emailing your partner a link to something funny or posting it on a Facebook wall. Put it in the form of a cute knock-knock joke or a haiku and present it to your partner.
Remember to say "please." Too many people fall into the habit of just telling their partners to do something. Start saying "please" and "thank you." It's amazing the difference it can make in your relationship.
Stop creating distance between the two of you whenever you're having some problems. Touch your partner on the arms or the face before you start talking about a hard topic. Once you've established physical contact, you can begin talking.
Don't complain all the time. Rather, tell your partner things you appreciate about him or her every day.
Stop focusing in on everything your partner does wrong. Don't expect him or her to read your mind. If you want something, ask for it.
Get support if your relationship is going through some hard problems. You need to reach out and find the support you need before your relationship goes down the tubes. This can be from counselors, psychologists, ministers or coaches. Find the one that suits you and the problem the best and utilize that support.
Stop assuming that you know what your partner wants or needs. Just because you know what YOU want doesn't mean that it's what your partner wants. You probably don't want affection shown in the exact same ways. However, you each can have what you need and want from the other one if you just communicate.
These are some of the more common problems that relationships go through over time. If you see yourself in any of these, start taking steps to correct them before they get worse.
